Songs and Fun from The Andy Griffith Show


"The Fishing Hole"

Well, now, take down your fishin' pole and
meet me at The Fishin' Hole,
We may not get a bite all day,
but don't you rush away.
What a great place to rest your bones and
mighty fine for skippin' stones,
You'll feel fresh as a lemonade,
a-settin' in the shade.
Whether it's hot, whether it's cool,
oh what a spot for whistlin' like a fool.
What a fine day to take a stroll and wander by
The Fishin' Hole,
I can't think of a better way
to pass the time o'day.

We'll have no need to call the roll when we get
to The Fishin' Hole,
There'll be you, me and Old Dog Trey,
to doodle time away.
If we don't hook a perch or bass,
we'll cool our toes in dewy grass,
Or else pull up a weed to chaw,
and maybe set and jaw.
Hangin' around, takin' our ease,
watchin' that hound a-scratchin' at his fleas.
Come on, take down your fishin' pole
and meet me at The Fishin' Hole,
I can't think of a better way
to pass the time o'day.

---------
Music by Earle Hagen and Herbert Spencer
Lyrics by Everett Sloane
(C) Copyright 1960, 1961, 1966 by Larrabee Music


Barney's Tribute to Juanita (Poem)

Juanita, Juanita,
Lovely, dear Juanita,
From your head down to your feet,
There's nothing half so sweet,
As Juanita, Juanita, Juanit.

Oh, there are things of wonder,
Of which men like to sing.
There are pretty sunsets and birds upon the wing,
But of the joys of nature,
None truly can compare,
With Juanita, Juanita, she of beauty beyond compare.
Juanita, Juanita, lovely dear Juanit.


"The Ballad of Andy and Barney" or "The Gangster's Mistake"
(Sung to the melody of "Frankie and Johnny")

Andy and Barney were lawmen.
Bravest you ever did see.
Warned every crook in the record book to stay out of Mayberry.
They were the law (Yes, they were the law),
And they didn't know fear.

Pretty Boy Floyd come a ridin'.
Dillinger, too, big as life. They weren't alone,
There was Al Capone and a Mack called Mack the Knife.
They broke the law
Yes, they broke the law.


"Oh, My Darin' Barney Fife"
(Sung to the melody of "Oh, My Darlin' Clementine")

In a jailhouse, down in Dixie, fightin' crime and riskin' life,
Dwelled a sheriff and his buddy, pistol-packing Barney Fife.
Oh, my darin', oh, my darnin' oh, my darin' Barney Fife.
He's a deadly crime-stopper, what a copper Barney Fife.

Then one day there come a-ridin' two bad men to rob a bank.
But Fife was tricky, a dead-eye dickey. Now they're locked up in the tank.

(Andy added the following)
Oh, my Barney, oh, my Barney, had a jail and couldn't lock it.
Had one bullet for his pistol, had to keep it in his pocket


"Come Fish Come"
(Said to ward off bad Omens)

Come fish come, come fish come,
Sam's at the gate, with a frosted cake,
come fish come.

Fly away buzzard, fly away crow,
way down South where the winds don't blow.
Rub your nose, and give two winks,
and save us from this awful jinx


Protection from a Man with a Hex
(Said while reaching your right arm over your head and touching your
left earlobe with your eyes closed.)

Wink'um pink'um,
nodamus rex,
protect us all,
from the man with the hex


"WELCOME SWEET SPRINGTIME"
(a.k.a. "Good ole 14-A")

Welcome sweet springtime,
We greet thee in song,
Mummers of gladness,
Fall on the ear.

Voices long hushed,
Now hear full notes, prolong,
Echoing far and near.

{CHORUS}
Sunshine awaits for,
The flower that's from seed,
Joy giving incense,
Fall on the air.

Snowdrops and primrose,
Both timidly beam,
Hailing the glad new year.

{BARN}
Balmy in life,
Breathing breezes are blowing,
Swiftly to nature,
New vigor's bestowing.

Oh, how my heart beats,
With rapture anew,
Earth's flower in beauty,
Again feeds my view.

{CHORUS}
Sunshine awaits for,
The flower that's from seed,
Joy giving incense,
Fall on the air.

{BARN}
Snowdrops and primrose,
Both timidly beam,
Hailing the glad new year.


"Old Aunt Maria"
Directly from the script "Mountain Wedding", which was purchased from Hoke Howell (Dud Wash) himself, here are the exact words that Ernest T. Bass sang to Charlene.
CHARLENE: Okay, Ernest T....Serenade away.
ERNEST T.: Awright, listen.......
(He accompanies himself by slapping the large can.)

Old Aunt Maria, jump in the fi-ah,
Fire too hot, jump in the pot,
Pot to black, jump in the crack,
Crack to high, jump in the sky,
Sky to blue, jump in canoe,
Canoe too shallow, jump in the tallow,
Tallow too soft, jump in the loft,
Loft to rotten, jump in the cotton,
Cotton so white she stay there all night.

CHARLENE: That's good, Ernest T.
ERNEST T.: Wanna hear 'Eatin' Goober Peas'?


"Flop Eared Mule"

Use to have an old Banjo,
It was all strung up with twine,
And the only song you could hear me sing was,
I wish that gal was mine.

Well, I wish that gal was mine, boys.
I wish that gal was mine,
And the only song you could hear me sing,
Was I wish that gal was mine.

Whoa mule, you kicking mule,
Whoa mule, I say,
I ain't got time to kiss you now,
My mule has run away.

Took my wife to the barn yard,
And I sit her down to supper,
Well, she got choked on a turkey leg,
And stuck her nose in the butter.

Stuck her nose in the butter,
Stuck her nose in the butter,
Well, she got choked on a turkey leg,
And stuck her nose in the butter.

Whoa mule, you kicking mule,
Whoa mule, I say,
Tie a knot in that old mules tail,
Before he runs away.

Your face is like a coffee pot,
Your nose is like a spout,
Your mouth is like a fireplace,
With all the ashes out.

Well, With all the ashes out, boys,
With all the ashes out,
Your mouth is like a fireplace,
With all the ashes out.

Whoa mule, you kicking mule,
Whoa mule, I say,
I ain't got time to kiss you now,
My mule has run away.
{REPEAT AND FADE}


Allan Newsome (Anewsome@aol.com)
"Mother Figure" Chapter - Huntsville, AL &
"Who's Been Messin' Up the Bulletin Board?" Chapter - Internet
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